listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize