What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize
