D3 body, D1 cock
my vag is so smooth its legendary
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
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