She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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