i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
