Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize