Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
