I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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