just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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