I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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