I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
