i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Randomize
