I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
