are you still at the devil's house?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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