So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize