We're like a lot better than the average bears
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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