you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
