He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Randomize
