i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
