i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
