You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize