She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize