They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
