So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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