Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize