we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
You brought string cheese to the strip club
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
