my mouth tastes like poor choices
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
How's work?
Spinning.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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