Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Come see our sink grown plant.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
