Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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