Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
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