Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
