the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
