Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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