STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
