Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Randomize
