used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
