he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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