How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize