end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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