She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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