She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
