Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize
