Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize