brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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