Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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