That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize