using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
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