Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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