So drunk its hurt
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
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