I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
