i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Damn victory sex feels great
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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